You Asked For It
By Jeannine Ackerson
Jan 9, 1997
Rating: R for bad words and a little kissing.
4th season spoiler warning: This is post Tunguska/Terma story.
Disclaimer (and all you lawyers at FOX take note): The X-Files as well as the characters portrayed therein belong to C. Carter, FOX Broadcasting, 1013 Prod., and most importantly they don't belong to me.
Relationship: Mulder/Scully romance. If you're still not convinced they belong together, even after seeing these episodes and "Pusher", then skip this.
Summary: Scully lets Mulder verbally have it after he asks her to, and lets something extra slip.
Author's Note: To tie up the loose ends Mr. Carter left me, I've had a cure found for the alien bio-toxin/black worms.
Hi All! After watching *the* courtroom scene in Terma (and yes, I've almost worn out that section of my video tape) I'm even *more* certain that Scully and Mulder belong together. But before that can happen, I think she would have needed to give him hell for all the stuff he's put her through. <g> And yes, this is the "Y" installment of the Alphabet Files. But now, on to the story. . .
It had been a week since Agent Fox Mulder had burst into the congressional hearing room to the astonishment of everyone assembled there - including his partner Dana Scully. It had been five days since she'd started the feverish search for the cure to that unknown bio-toxin. Once she'd found out about his being infected, she'd dived right in, working round the clock to find a cure.
It had been two days since she'd help discover the cure for the alien virus, the black worm like creatures that he'd been infected with in the hellish prison camp in Russia. There had been a long line of volunteers to try the serum. Mulder had even insisted he be the first guinea pig, but Scully and the toxicologists had found another way to ensure that it was safe. They were furnished the names of some terminally ill patients willing to test it, and had treated them successfully.
It had been one day since Mulder had been treated in the Georgetown Medical Center with the serum and given a clean bill of health.
But it was only today that it was starting to become apparent how serious things were. Mulder and Scully stood in their basement office several feet from each other, almost as if nothing had ever happened.
Except for one thing.
Mulder watched Scully go about as if it was business as usual, but he knew better. She'd been through hell again. Because of him. He had to figure out just what he had to do to make things better. Because they weren't and he *needed* them to be right again.
Finally he realized that she needed to vent her frustration, her pain . . . *everything*. Even if it had to be directed at him. It all came down to the fact that they needed to heal the wounds they both had before they could go about repairing their friendship and partnership.
"Scully," he said tentatively, not sure how to go about this with her. She turned from the filing she was doing and glanced over at him. She gave him a look with a questioning eyebrow, and he continued. "I need you to do something. I need you to get mad at me."
"Excuse me?!?" she sputtered, her eyes registering more than a little shock at his words.
"Come on Scully, just let me have it. I know that you're furious with me and holding it all in won't help any," Mulder said to her in a pleading tone.
The truth of the matter was that Scully was more than just furious. She was positively steaming mad. Not only had he ditched her for the *umpteenth* time, but she'd had to cover his ass with Skinner and even *Congress*. But she wouldn't let him know how much it bothered her, because some of it wasn't his fault. *She* was the one who kept covering for him. She could stop if she wanted, let him get himself out of his own messes, but she hadn't. She couldn't. He was her partner after all. She owed him *that* much.
Mulder watched her as she shuffled papers in the file cabinet as an excuse to put the discussion off. Thinking on it now, he had never realized how often he'd put her into these tough situations. He'd taken it for granted how she'd always backed him up and protected him. And this time he'd found out that she'd gone to *jail* for him.
*She* hadn't told him that. He'd learned it by accident. Skinner had dropped by the basement and asked him if it had been worth it to put her in such a position. It was only then that he'd learned the truth. When he'd found out, he'd been shocked, touched and even proud. His skeptical Scully had taken *his* position in the face of adversity. Even though she knew what the repercussions could be for following in his footsteps, she had done it. She had defied Congress because she believed in what he did. Because she believed in him.
She'd risked her career and her future for him. Again. And what had he been doing while she'd been sitting in a jail cell for him? He'd been running around Russia with Krycek and getting his ass kicked in the process.
Then when he had returned, he'd barged in those doors to the astonishment of everyone, even Scully. The look on her face when he'd come in had surprised him, as well as had taken his breath away.
And then that hug . . .
He let out a silent sigh. It just seemed like he kept screwing up her life, and she kept letting him do it, without complaint. He knew she needed to express to him some of what she was feeling. Let it out. So he was giving her carte blanche to do so. Offering her a free shot so to speak. Whether or not she took it . . . But he knew she needed to. And he needed her to do it too. The guilt had gotten too much. He *needed* her to let him have it.
Her voice jarred him back to the discussion.
"No, . . . It doesn't matter Mulder. I'm just glad you're back," she declared, not giving in to his plea.
"Scully, please. I want you to be honest with me. I've screwed up a lot lately, and I know it. But I really need you to tell me how you feel about this."
She stood there for a long moment, and he could almost see the wheels in her head moving as she pondered what he was suggesting. What he was asking. To let go of her control, to let her emotions have free reign for once. It seemed like she wasn't sure if she could do that. With a long sigh, she looked up at him and shook her head 'no'.
The frown on his face deepened as he realized she was protecting him once more. But this time it was from her. And he wasn't going to let her do it anymore.
"Dammit Scully?" he nearly roared. "What do I have to do to make you mad enough to yell at me? To make you get it all out? Run off on you again? Treat your opinion like shit? Take out another entomologist while we're on a case? What?"
She turned slowly away from the file cabinet and met his gaze. Her eyes had darkened as soon as he had begun his little speech, and by the time he'd off-handedly mentioned Dr. Bambi, she was as angry as he'd ever seen her. No, he amended quickly, he'd never seen her this angry before. And in a moment he knew that all that anger was going to be directed straight at him. Taking half a second to mentally brace himself, Mulder prepared himself for the worst.
He was not disappointed.
"You God Damned Son of a Bitch!" she screamed, slamming the drawer of the file cabinet closed and glaring at him with the full fire of her fury. "It's *always* about you, isn't it?!? What about me? I'm your *Partner* dammit! You're supposed to trust me, talk to me, *work* with me for Christ's sake! But no, not Fox Mulder. No, he doesn't need *anybody*! He's just been humoring his little sidekick of a partner for the last three and a half years. Ditching her whenever he feels like it. Making a fool out of her in front of everyone, ruining her career . . ."
Mulder jaw nearly dropped, and he stood there, stunned beyond words. That she could think these things . . . Obviously he'd been so wrapped up in himself and his pursuit of the paranormal, his search for Samantha and the answers he was looking for that he'd never noticed what he'd done to her. How he'd treated her. Everything she'd was saying was the truth. And now, like it or not, he had to face it.
"But no, I had to go and *prove* that I was equal to "Spooky" Mulder. Follow where no sane person would have gone. I took the heat, covered your ass, saved your life, whatever I could to keep you and your God Damned X-Files alive. Hell, I even fell in love with you when I knew it was the *stupidest* move I could make. Not like you would ever give a damn. Not with all those bimbo Bambi types throwing themselves at you. No, I was just "good old Scully", good enough to take care of you when you nearly get yourself killed, but never good enough to be in your heart *or* in your bed . . ." she yelled again, on the verge of rambling.
It was like the flood gates of a dam bursting open at the pressure of too much water. And in Scully's case it was too many emotions. So many that she wasn't even thinking about what she was saying anymore.
But Mulder was, and he was listening very closely. So he had heard what she hadn't meant to say. Once those few simple words had left her mouth, he'd nearly toppled over. As it was he'd ended up propping himself up with a hand on his desk. Love? Him? She? The words had made sense, but he was still having trouble processing the information.
"Scully? Did I hear you right? You said that . . ." Mulder cut in, even though his mind was still reeling. "You said you fell in love with me?!?"
He watched as the anger in her eyes and face disappeared and was quickly replaced with a look of pure shock. What had she said, what had she let slip? Oh God, she realized suddenly, I said it! He knows! Slowly she turned away from him, needing the space that the maneuver would afford her. But she could feel his presence there behind her, not more than four feet away. He stood there, waiting for an answer from her.
Searching for support, she backed up against the wall, feeling its hardness brace her. Then with a superhuman effort and nerves of steel she lifted her gaze to meet his. When he stared into the crystal blue of her eyes, he found that the flame that had been there moments ago had been replaced with something closer to deep regret.
"I fell in love with you," she said quietly, the pain that admission caused evident in her voice. Then she slid down the wall to sit in a huddled mass, her arms wrapping around her knees and her head dropping onto them.
It wasn't more than a second before Mulder was on the floor and by her side. With the most gentle of touches, he cupped her cheek and ear, and lifted her face up to meet his.
She had been expecting a sorrowful "God Scully, I'm sorry" look, or maybe a "Oh God, now what?" shocked one, or even a "We'll work this out" look of indifference. But it wasn't any of those things. It was a genuine grin. Broader than she'd ever seen on him. If someone had pressed her to describe how he looked at the moment, she would 've had to have said "elated."
And it confused the hell out of her.
"I'm glad Dana. I'm really glad that you fell in love with me. Because I fell in love with you, and I've never been able to tell you that. So, do you want to yell at me some more for my stupidity, or can I kiss you like I've been dreaming of for the last three years?" Mulder asked, his voice deep and rough.
She couldn't answer, but simply nodded her head. With that he drew her face closer as he leaned in and lightly pressed his lips to hers. Then that wasn't enough, and he ran his tongue along her lips, asking silent permission to be let in. As her lips parted to him, he delved deeper, his mouth crushing hers, his tongue sliding along the inside of her mouth. And after a minute of surprise at his sheer enthusiasm and passion, she was kissing him back with equal fervor.
He finally pulled his lips from hers, and leaned back so he could look at her.
"You know Dana," he said breathlessly, but with a glint of happiness in his eyes, "you should have gotten mad at me like this sooner. I kind of like the results."
"Well Mulder," she said as she held his hands tightly in hers, a smile crossing her face, "I just want you to remember that you asked for it."
Well, we're near the wire on the Alphabet Files. Only 7 left to go. <g> J.
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