1st Year

 

(This is a series, incorporating three separate stories. The first was posted separately in Oct '96, then two were added recently to create the series.)

7/18/97

By J. "Writing Machine" Ackerson

Rating: PG.

Spoiler warning: "Herrenvolk", "The Field Where I Died" and "Unruhe". (But nothing beyond them. . . so no "Memento Mori".)

Disclaimer: The X-Files and its characters are property of C.C., FOX & 1013. "Your Love Amazes Me" and "Faithfully" are by John Berry, and "It's Your Love" is by Tim McGraw and Faith Hill(-McGraw), and aren't mine.

Relationship: Lots of MSR. Anti-relationshippers should skip merrily away from this story, singing their anti-shipper songs.

Summary: Scully and Mulder celebrate their first year "anniversary".

Hi All! This is what I call an "accidental" series. I didn't plan to do it, but it became a trilogy. But then, I've learned not to fight these things. But let's get on to the story . . .

Part I: Amazes Me

 

For all the women he'd known, all the women of flesh and blood or of cellulose like his videos, there wasn't another woman on the planet like Dana Scully.

He was a lucky man. He got to be with her, work with her. Every day. Side by side at all hours of the day and night.

And tonight he was having dinner with her.

So Fox Mulder sat there in one of the classiest restaurants in D.C., one with linen tablecloths, candles and menus that didn't have prices and waited. And as he waited for her, he thought about the things that made him love her. She was beautiful. That was a given. He'd always known that, right from the first moment. But it wasn't just the stunning red hair, or the fair skin, or the liquid blue eyes or that perfect mouth. It was her insides too. The generous heart, the brilliant mind, the caring soul. He loved all of her.

She was strong. They'd been through tough times together. They had stood by each other through so much. She'd saved his butt more times than even *he* could recall. She was his strength when he had none. She always would be.

She was compassionate, and often wore her heart on her sleeve. They'd found comfort from each other in the darkest of hours. He had broken down in her arms at his mother's bedside. She had let him take her in his when her sister died, and then in Minneapolis, because of Donnie Pfaster. But through it all, they'd survived because they were together.

She was talented. Not only was she skilled in her profession as a forensic pathologist, her abilities as an agent had never failed to impress him. The way she could put things together. Her stubborn determinedness, her skepticism, her faith in science. How she could stare down U.S. Generals, State Senators and mass murderers. She never ceased to amaze him.

With a silent sigh, his mind went involuntarily to darker thoughts. He thought about what he'd do without her. He'd nearly lost her. More times than he wanted to consider. The last one that stood out vividly in his mind had been Gerry Schnauz. And it had scared him badly. Instead of his normal concern, he'd fallen quickly into self-recrimination and depression. He'd frantically searched for her, wracking his mind for the lead he needed to find her. Then when he finally did, he'd ripped at the metal door of the trailer. When that didn't work, he took a metal pipe to it, breaking it open, and then he'd shot their suspect without a second thought. He hadn't cared about anything other than getting her back.

But most of all, he thought with a smile, Dana Katherine Scully *loved* him. With a fierceness and totality that awed him. It put his own feelings to shame.

So he sat there, waiting for her to arrive. He'd mailed her a formal invitation to her place, edged in gold asking her to meet him for dinner. He brushed down the lapels of his charcoal suit jacket, then tugged on his dark burgundy tie. He was respectable for a change. A small concession for her.

Over in the bar part of the restaurant he heard the pianist start up a new set. The tune was familiar, and he searched his memory to find the title. Once he'd seized on it, his photographic memory allowed him to literally see the words in his head. They could have been written by him, and were more than fitting.

//"I've seen the seven wonders of the world

I've seen the beauty of diamonds and pearls

But they ain't nothing baby

Your love amazes me

I've seen a sunset that could make you cry

Colors of a rainbow reaching cross the sky

The moon in all its phases

But your love amazes me"//

He closed his eyes and let the memory of the lyrics and the tune wind it's way through his mind. He smiled slightly thinking about the woman who inspired his thoughts. Inspired him.

//"Don't you ever doubt this love of mine

You're the only one for me

You give me hope, you give me reason

You give me something to believe in

Forever, faithfully

Your love amazes me

I prayed for miracles that never came

I got down on my knees out in the pouring rain

But only you could save me

Your love amazes me"//

She had saved him. Numerous times. From the Consortium, the government, and assundry criminals. But most importantly, from himself. It was true, he'd prayed for Samantha's return, and he still hadn't received that wish. But Dana. . . something or someone had made sure she kept coming back to him.

Like when he'd done that hypno-regression session. Afterwards he realized that there were too many holes in his accounts for it to be real, but one thing had made itself evident. He had wanted to believe Scully had been with him in those past lives. Had made sure she was there beside him, in some role. After that, he had found it impossible to deny the fact that their souls belonged together.

//"Don't you ever doubt this love of mine

You're the only one for me

You give me hope, you give me reason

You give me something to believe in

Forever, faithfully

Your love amazes me"//

Among all the things he'd seen; aliens and UFO's, conspiracies and genetic mutants, the one thing that did constantly surprise and amaze him was his partner. The woman he loved more than he could ever express.

Suddenly as the music ended she stood before him. Her flowing teal satin dress covered everything important, leaving everything up to his imagination. Which was fine by him. His imagination filled in the blanks quite nicely.

He looked at her hand resting on the back of the chair opposite him. Took note of the delicate fingers, and a gold and aquamarine ring on her finger. It was stunning. It matched her eyes.

Quickly he got up and pulled the chair out for her, letting her sit and pushing it in for her. When he returned to his own seat, he found her hidden behind the menu, and frowned unconsciously. It looked like she was avoiding his gaze for the moment. Then she dropped the menu to the table, and caught his eyes.

She smiled across the table at him, looking gloriously happy. But that was the way she normally was nowadays. Smiling, lighthearted, happy. Joy and happiness did that to a person. He knew that for a fact. Because they both were happy. And had been for a while now.

They'd been happy ever since he'd told her, and she'd told him. Since that day he'd knelt at her side. Since the day they'd stood together with their hearts, souls and hands together. Yes, they'd both been happy since they'd admitted they loved each other, since he'd asked her to marry him, and especially since they'd stood in the church a year before and said the vows that had made them husband and wife.

Reaching over, he caught her hand in his, brushing his fingers over her wedding ring. Then he smiled back, and softly said what he never imagined he'd ever be able to say to her.

"Happy Anniversary."

Part II: Faithfully

Dana Scully sat and contentedly stared at her husband. There were days, back when they'd first been partnered that she thought she'd never be here. Never have his love.

Yet here she was, married to the man she loved more than life itself. Married to him for a year today to be precise. Her partner at work. Her partner for life.

Her *partner*, Fox Mulder.

She smiled at him as she looked him over, taking in the beautiful suit. It was one that she loved on him. Then she took note of his 'accessories'. He'd worn a *sedate* tie. Probably the only one that he owned. The thought that he had to have dug through every single one of his GQ rejected collection to find it touched her heart.

He glanced at her grin with a furrow of his brows and a questioning look. Her eyes flickered from his, to his tie, and then back up.

Getting the non-verbal message, he simply gave her a sheepish look, a shrug and a little smile.

Just that small smile sent her heart soaring. After all this time, not the one year together, but the six years of being with one another, she still loved him. Actually, she had to say that she loved him now more than ever.

"What looks good?" she asked, slipping back behind the menu and actually looking at it for the first time since arriving.

"You," he said seductively, and she lowered her menu to stare at him.

"I meant on the menu," she retorted lightly, one of her eyebrows arching in amusement.

There really wasn't a need for conversation. Their ability to communicate with looks and gestures sometimes said everything they wanted to, and more so.

There were too many instances that she could think of where that was the case. Her mind found them all pressing forward, waiting to be acknowledged. The fact that her thoughts were open allowed her to notice what she hadn't before.

Music. Behind her in the bar, she heard the pianist starting another selection. As the refrain began, she recognized the song and knew who the performer usually was. John Berry. God, that man just knew how to sing love songs, she mused. His songs always seemed to echo her emotions when it came to Mulder. And as the lyrics came back to her, running through her mind, she knew that this one was no exception.

//Some say it's just the nature of the beast

When you love somebody so passionately

Time has a way of stealing that raging fire feeling

Leaving the ashes laying at your feet//

They had wondered about that. If the relationship could handle the intensity that every aspect now afforded them. It had been part of the reason they had refrained from pursuing it. The physical part that was. Emotionally, spiritually they had been together for a long time.

But the feelings had never dimmed, they'd only intensified. If anything, the ashes lying around them were from the things that melted and charred in the wake of their emotions. Nothing compared to the bond they had. It left no room for anything or anyone else.

//Those fools of little faith will never know

Those higher places two hearts can go

Where time is standing still and love will burn until

The heavens and the earth have come and gone//

No, she'd come to realize that their love was a rare and fine thing. Something that had gotten them through so much. Death and rebirth.

No one within the Bureau had really understood them taking the chances they had taken before they'd married. By coming 'out' about the relationship, they were risking everything. Their partnership and their careers for 'this'.

Those fools just didn't know what it was like to *love* like this, she mused. She thought of Mulder's regression. How the love that he felt for her, and she for him had bled into his "past lives". How they had almost lost everything because of Melissa/Sarah.

But out of that near tragedy Mulder had found his true soul mate. Because when he'd asked if Scully would have changed a day, she'd told him "no". That declaration had been for all intents and purposes her vow of love and devotion to him. And he'd acknowledged that not too long afterwards, much to their mutual pleasure.

//This fire inside for you is constant as the Northern Star

And you will be forever in my heart

As long as there's a river searching for an endless sea

I will always love you

Faithfully//

*Faithfully.*

That was a good way to describe it, she realized. For even though she had been assigned to the X-Files, to work with him, it had never been just a job to her. Not after meeting the "FBI's Most Unwanted."

It hadn't been love at first sight. No, that had come later, over time, with trust. No, it had been mutual respect at that first meeting. And that had been the key to it all. To everything that had followed. All the emotion, the passion, the commitment. It all came out of that partnership. That belief in one another.

And she thanked God daily that they'd finally admitted it to one another. Before they had to go through another setback. Before she ended up having to identify his body, fear for his life, have him fear for hers one more time.

No, she didn't want to even consider the possibility that they'd almost lost the chance because of their stupidity, pride and fear.

//Tonight we'll raise a glass to lovers across the ages

We'll hold each other and toast to the day

When history's said and done and we still stand as one

Some things were never meant to fade away//

No, they wouldn't fade away. They had tried to destroy them, kill them, separate them, but they couldn't do it. The two of them were too strong for that. They always found their way back to one another.

Against every odd. Even when there had been no way that they could have found each other. Like when she'd been kidnapped by Gerry Schnauz. Mulder had somehow located them. Come to her rescue.

Saved her.

Somehow he'd known, just *known* how to find her.

Because they *were* one.

//This fire inside for you is constant as the Northern Star

And you will be forever in my heart

As long as there's a river searching for an endless sea

I will always love you

Faithfully//

They were a constant. No doubt about it. Their opposition was their strength. Their passions their shield. Their love their gift.

No matter what happened, ten years, twenty, she knew that she would be in love with Fox Mulder and he would be in love with her.

Scully watched as the waiter came over and showed Mulder a bottle of champagne. With a nod from her partner, best friend and husband, it was uncorked and poured for them, the bottle deposited into a silver bucket at the side of the table.

And behind them, the song began to wrap up, the last chorus playing.

//This fire inside for you is constant as the Northern Star

And you will be forever in my heart

As long as there's a river searching for an endless sea

I will always love you

Faithfully//

She couldn't suppress the smile at the song and the feelings it mirrored in her soul. Carefully she reached for, then lifted the glass of champagne in front of her and brought it up. His eyes focused on and then held her gaze, and he brought his own glass up to meet hers. Her voice was like velvet as the words came out at a near whisper.

"To fifty more."

Part III: It's Your Love

 

Dinner had been wonderful, and the couple had made their way home together, taking Mulder's car, as Scully had taken a cab from the apartment.

There was no need to talk on the way, and Scully and Mulder just sat and enjoyed the quiet time together. It always seemed that they never found enough of it. Even now.

When they arrived at the building, Mulder found a parking place and pulled in. Shutting off the engine, they both proceeded to get out and walked hand in hand to the front door of the apartment building.

Taking the elevator up, they watched each other on the opposite side of the car. Their eyes spoke volumes even as they kept silent. The doors finally opened, and the walked down the corridor to their front door. Once there, Scully moved aside and let him open the door.

It swung open revealing a darkened living room. Except it wasn't quite dark.

Dozens of candles lit the room with a soft glow. Some rested on the fireplace mantle. Others on the coffee table. More on the desk and table behind the couch.

"How did you find time to do this?" he asked with surprise and delight.

"I had some help," she explained as she went inside, and held out a hand to him to urge him to follow her.

He was right behind her without any more prompting, and shut the door behind him. He heard the bolt latch with a click while still staring at his wife and her romantic surprise surrounding them.

"Who? When?" he questioned curiously, smiling at her as he came closer, his hands resting on her shoulders, then trailing down her arms.

"I got the Gunmen to do it. When I stopped at the restroom before we left from dinner. I called the guys to come and set up. We were on our way out, and well, they know how long it takes us to get home. . ."

Mulder chuckled at the image of his conspiracy cohorts racing over and setting up this little 'surprise'. But then, Scully could get them all, especially Frohike to do anything she asked of them. Just like with me, he thought.

Behind them, the soft sounds of romantic music floated, and Mulder decided to go with the flow of things.

"Dance with me?" he asked softly.

Scully smiled and walked into his embrace as an answer. He kissed her lightly, and then he took her in his arms as the song changed. They danced close, holding each other tight. They barely moved, just swaying and shuffling their feet in a circle.

//Dancin' in the dark, middle of the night

Taking your heart and holdin' it tight

Emotional touch, touching my skin

And asking you to do what you've been doing

All over again//

It was almost autobiographical as they did exactly as the song was saying. The fact that their emotions were so deep, their love so strong made it all the more true.

They both knew that the other held their heart. It had been like that for years before they had actually admitted their feelings to one another. The bond had been true since that first day. Since they'd gained one another's trust. They had gone deep into each other and filled in the empty places without realizing it.

And the touches. . . they had been able to effect each other with the smallest of touches. His hand at her back; her hand on his arm; his hand cupping her cheek, her hand on his head. And the hugs. The soul consuming hugs.

The physical and mental and spiritual were all there.

Over and over again.

//Oh it's a beautiful thing

Don't think I can keep it all in

I just gotta let you know

What it is that won't let me go

It's your love

It just does something to me

It sends a shock right through me

I can't get enough

And if you wonder about the spell I'm under

Oh, it's your love//

That was more than the truth. From that first day, there had been that connection. And as the time had gone on, the love had grown from the partnership and friendship.

Their first kiss had been a shock. Actually, Mulder had sworn that she'd been holding a live wire in her hands. She had been just as moved as him, but had chalked it all up to nearly five years of repressed emotions and desires. Analytical to the last, Mulder had retorted, and she had smiled at his reference.

From there they had continued to build on the base of the relationship, exploring the new depths of it. A kiss led to a caress. A caress to a grasp. A grasp to a tug of clothes and months later to much more than they'd ever thought they'd be allowed to have with their partner and best friend.

Something that they knew now that they would never get enough of.

//Better than I was, more than I am

And all of this happened by taking your hand

And who I am now is who I wanted to be

And now that we're together I'm stronger than ever

I'm happy and free//

Mulder smiled at her in the candlelight, the glow catching her eyes and lighting her hair. There hadn't been truer words ever spoken for him. She did make him better. Together they were so much more.

Stronger. Happier.

He thought back to the days before she had come into his life. They were dark and devoid of life. And the three months that she'd been missing had been worse than that. It had been hell.

Scully returned the smile. She knew that he felt like she made him better than he was alone. And no matter how hard she tried to convince him, he wouldn't believe that she felt the same way. They made each other more than they were separately. And that they had since day one. It was just as the relationship had gone on, they had completed each other more and more.

They made each other better and stronger.

//Oh, it's a beautiful thing

Don't think I can keep it all in

And if you ask me why I changed

All I have to do is say your sweet name

It's your love

It just does something to me

It sends a shock right through me

I can't get enough

And if you wonder about the spell I'm under

Oh, it's your love//

It was a spell. There was no doubt about it. It was a sunflower seed/iced tea and root beer/"I wouldn't put myself on the line for anyone but you Mulder" and "I still have you"/barbecue sauce and bullet wounds/life and death/belief and faith and trust kind of spell.

And one they never wanted to break.

Their love was something that had been no surprise really. How could they not fall in love with each other when their souls, hearts and minds were already joined?

The years had drawn them together. Times that they had gravitated to each other. The respect that they had for each other. The depth of loss they felt when the other was away. The pain at thinking they were dead or injured or missing.

And now, now they couldn't get enough of the feeling of being together. Never had.

//Oh it's a beautiful thing

Don't think I can keep it all in

I just gotta let you know

What it is that won't let me go

It's your love

It just does something to me

It sends a shock right through me

I can't get enough

And if you wonder about the spell I'm under

Oh, it's your love

Oh, it's your love

Oh, it's your love//

And even as the song ended, they continued to dance. Finally they broke apart, both circling the room in opposite directions, blowing out the flickering candles. Finished, they met at the center of the room again where in the dark they shared another kiss. This one though was more passionate, more intense.

Mulder ran his hands up her arms and framed her face with them. Eyes met eyes and souls met souls just as they had six years ago.

Laying her hands over his, she gently pulled them down, taking them in her grasp. Then, without another word, she led them into their bedroom to celebrate their anniversary "properly".

-End-

Well, there we go. Hope you liked it. J.

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